partners in everything

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it took a few days for me to figure out what to do with this partners challenge. I absolutely love the word ‘partner’.  I use it in place of husband a lot. Just something I have to do????????????????  he is my partner/spouse/husband/cook/bestfriend.  then I thought Jax and I make darn good partners.  He is half deaf, I am half blind.  It just works.  But I needed better than one of us. Plus a photo of us would end up being a selfie and I am not ready for that.  Snoop E may post selfies.  I may not.

then it came to me.  I had 2 very cool partners in my life for over 14 years.  They were the Beagle Brothers.  and boy were they ever great partners.  their partnership started early.  they were from the same litter. September 28th 1999. I only remember this as it just happens to be my Babca’s birthday as well, but she was born in 1907.

So, enter our beagle partners/kids/brothers/troubletimes2/Boys

NOT my Picture, but helped tell the story

 

 

 

I see !!!! Icey

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The first time I was asked, “what is different about you since you quit smoking?”  I was asked this question during an interview for a documentary on using mindfulness to relieve oneself of addiction.  My first thought was, “I am a nicer person.” Being interviewed by a professional interviewer type person, that answer was so not going to be enough. I continued on with, “i am able and willing to see other people better or clearer even.  i am more aware of how others might be feeling or what they could be thinking.” Stay Tuned on July 4th. link available July5th

I can see that the way others react or act is not a reflection on me.  maybe they just stubbed their toe 2 minutes before seeing me and it still stings.  the way i interact with other people is what matters.

So,

I quit smoking.  I have done it using a mindfulness app I ‘accidentally stumbled upon’.  I knew I had to/wanted to/needed to quit. I was in a fog wondering  how to go about it.  then One thing happened that led to another. that thing appeared to lead to another thing which led to another then another and another.  Today I am smoke free and grateful.

I feel as though I have somehow moved from using Mindfulness practice to quit smoking to  Mindful Living.

This was not My Plan.

My Plan was to use Mindfulness in an attempt to better control the ever powerful anxiety I experience.  I needed to get a handle on this monster and pills were no longer a viable solution.  I needed something better.  Apparently I was ready for something better.

Enter MINDFULNESS.  I should add the word Again to that last sentence.  I had my 1st introduction to mindfulness 28 years ago.  second exposure 15 years ago.  I now see that these experiences have prepared me for where I am right now.  Right Now! Right Here! Not worrying about a future that might never happen.  Not dwelling on a past I cannot change.

not the worst place to be!!

Changes…. not in any particular order and not a compete list.  Keep in mind these are not changes I planned. I did not sit down one night and make a list of things I wanted to change in me.  To be honest, i did not know i needed to change.  want to change?  Not even a little.

The only change I desired was to no longer smoke

to be smoke free.

  • i no longer have the need to get everything done right now.    for example : i want to finish writing this post. i am not going to die if i save it and finish it later.  last year or even last month, “ineedtodoit! doitnow! cantwait! mustgetitdonenow! nomtterwht.”  just a tad anxiety provoking from inside.  no outside trigger needed.
  • i smile more.  not because life is so freakin awesome and I have no reason not to smile but because if i smile, maybe someone who is lucky enough to see me smile will smile. then someone else might smile and then someone else….
  • i am calmer. inconveniences and other people’s stupid behavior that would have once throw me into fits of panic/anger/depression/disappointment affect me in a different way.  i am able to take a tad bit o time and breathe.  This breathing thing is not new to me.  People in my life have been suggesting it forever and a day.  Regular, consistant mindfulness practice got me to remember to breathe when I need to.
  • I am nicer.  i already talked about that.  I have always been a relatively nice person, but now I am even nicer and to more people.
  • i sleep better. not longer, Better. I wake up earlier, yet less tired. more refreshed
  • life is the same.  pleasant and unpleasant things are always going to happen. That is Life. That is not going to change, But…. i can change. I deal with life’s obstacles in a new way.  i am capable of dealing with the life stuff in a way that i was never capable of before.
  • i stopped biting my nails while I quit smoking  – it took me awhile to even notice my nails were growing.
  • i eat slower and enjoy what I eat.  quitting smoking definitely makes things taste better, but i enjoy that better taste more.  Food was always just something I ate so I didn’t fall down.  Now I take the time to savor every bite. I’ve begun experimenting with a variety of new recipes as well.
  • I am more capable of thinking before i speak.  I have always either talked too much or not at all.  Now when a thought flies into my brain I am able to stop, breathe, give myself a chance to decide if this thought needs to exit through my mouth or do I let it go.
  • I feel feelings.  this is a direct result of the mindfulness app I used to quit smoking.  The app suggested instead of fighting the cigarette cravings, i might try to really feel them.  Truly feeling the craving and seeing it for what it truly is. Watching it leave without my having to smoke, made my mind stronger, made the next craving a bit easier to deal with. Doing this over and over again helped me form a new healthy habit.  I am now applying this same technique to feelings.
  • I am able to feel what is going on in my body quicker.  i am a diehard jaw clencher. I always have been. Today I am able to notice my clenched jaw quicker than ever before.  Once I am able to identify that I am clenching my jaw, I am able to take steps to stop it.  My jaw, teeth,dentist, and head are grateful.
  • i worry less and Care more

Now, how to end this.  Do I even have to end this?  Do I want this to end?  The answer is so simple.  No.  I am on a new journey and I choose not to end it too soon.  I finally truly and completely believe that I am Going to be okay. No, wait, I AM OKAY!!!!

To summarize.  I exposed myself to mindfulness practice in an effort to relieve self of debilitating anxiety. An App that uses mindfulness to help relieve oneself of unwanted habits found me.  My desire to quit and the repetition of that App not only relieved me of my habit, it opened me up to a whole new way of thinking and feeling and living.

 

 

 

curves curves and more curves

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I was on my way here to share an experience with you.  I then realized it was Friday.  The new weekly Photo Challenge comes out on Friday. Who does not love a Friday?   I shall continue with my experience, go check today’s challenge, and finish this later.  2 days later I came up with this…………….

HERE GOES

I went to pick up our large pizza with bacon & extra cheese.
I was greeted by the owner of the shop. I had met him once before.
He gave me my pizza and said “$11.95”.
“whoa”, i replied. “that is not nearly enough”
“Enough for you. You nice lady. You no pay extra.”I stashed my 2 $20’s
and gave him everything else I had (around $15). As he started to make change, I gestured toward his employees and said, “give it to them.” it all went in the tip jar.

So, CURVE it shall be

Life is so Full of Curves.  The owner of the Pizza joint threw me a CURVE by remembering I went out of my way to Thank him…………….Once…………….6 months ago.

I shall now throw a few curves at you. they appear to be Every where.  All around me.  all you have to do is Look!  Do you see them too?

curvyRoad

 

curve

 

 

 

Pure? Not So Pure.

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My very first thought when i saw this weeks challenge was water.  Water is pure. I even have pictures I have already taken of water. Easy challenge this week. or so I thought. Unfortunately my pictures involved rain water and Rain Water is not so pure any more.

WaterPure

Over Flowing Gutter

 

watering tomatoescrop

Now that is just where you belong

watering tomatoes

Watering the tomatoes????

Could that Big Black Beast on the Left possibly be 1 reason my water & air aren’t so pure anymore?

So, getting back to Pure.  My next thought involved babies.  Can’t get much purer than Babies.  Hmmm.  I probably shouldn’t go up to a complete stranger to ask if I could take pictures of their kid.  I love meeting new people, but that would be a bit Too weird. For all of us. So, Stranger’s Babies are not an option.  Then I remembered, My cousin and her wife just had a lil one. I can find pictures of her.  But, they would not have been taken by me and it would be rather rude to steal them.

Welcome to the big bad world Reese. No need to ever worry.  Your Moms will always keep you safe.  Not to mention your humongous extended family has no issue with kicking some butt for you now and again.

Pure? Babies? Babies. Duh!!!! Babies!!!!  I know where to find tons of them. After all It is baby season at The Farm.  New ones being born every day.

NutMegandMom

Introducing Spice and her brand new baby NutMeg

NutMeg and Spice are Nubian goats.  NutMeg was born a few hours before this picture was taken.  Today even.  The Mom might not be so pure, but her daughter certainly is. Nubians are highly Intelligent animals, but can have a stubborness about them.  Very simlilar to my last three dogs. I had to get SnoopE and the Beagle Bros in here somewhere.

So, PURE

not so PURE

used to be PURE

might always be PURE ????

Oh and here is another Not so pure. But, a heck of a lot of FUN to be around.

DebRumi